Whiskey River Bar Soap - Fucking Zen

Om. I don't get it. I've been sitting here raking the litter box for the last two hours and I don't feel anything but annoyed, and frankly, a little nauseous. Whoever said zen gardens are meditative and spiritually healing never met my cat, Bill the Shitter. Yeah, I know. I could buy a "real" zen garden but that would cut into my beer money. And that shit ain't happening. 

Handmade vegan soap bar designed by Whiskey River Soap Co. artisans with fragrance blends to match their popular candles.  Clever descriptions of who each bar of soap is designed for make these a funny gift item!  

Front of label says: Soap for FUCKING ZEN - Smells like can I get a little fucking peace? (Fuck it, let's rage.)

Back of label says: Soap for FUCKING ZEN - Mindful shit. Some fucking meditation. Probably a nap.

Cool Cucumber Scented

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Soap size: 3 1/2" H x 2 3/4" W x 1" D.

Net Weight: 6 oz.

Ingredients: Coconut oil, palm oil, safflower oil, glycerine, purified water, sodium hydroxide, sorbitol, sorbitan oleate, soy bean protein, coloring, fragrance

Shrink-wrapped with a kraft brown label.

Directions for use printed on the label:  Rinse, lather, repeat. Do not eat. Do not invite friends over and serve over a bed of organic wild rice. Organic rice is way out of your budget.

Made in Newark, Ohio - United States